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My boyfriend. My friends. My music. Poetry. My family. Eating chocolate. Life. Cats. Computers. Thunderstorms. Being myself.Sex.
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Liars. Cheaters. Stupid people. Working for Wal-Mart. Posers. Brittney Spears. Hilary Duff.People who call themselves your "friends" when they are not.Traffic.
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The Diary
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Nut Case 101?? Oh look, I am updating before a whole week went by. You'll have to excuse my scarasm, only because things are now hitting me. My mind is overloaded and for days now I could not sleep very well. You can say, I have a lot on my mind. Which also left my eating habits very little to chew on. Some people are saying I am depressed. I don't think I am. I'm taking this as a payback for my actions for the past 2 months. Yet, I can't ignore or get over the things that unfolded. Something is snagging me to the highest level and it's not quilt either. It feels like I never really didn't do anything wrong but get drunk off my ass little over a week ago. That something is keeping me from sleeping very well at night. The frist time this as happened to me was on Jan 31th. When something just kept waking me up. I dunno what it is, but it still is. I would have a strong dream and then it would jerk me awake like someone was waking me up. Odd thing is, I don't remember much of my dream even though it was very vivid. I kinda feel like I am losing my mind. With all the stress and other pressures building up, I feel like I am going to snap like a tree branch. An not really have a nervous break down, but me really coming out of my shell. All of this is swimming around in my head, and trying to make sense for other people to understand is what is making me keep some distances from people. I must sound like I have lost my mind when things come out of my mouth. I must look like a damn fool to people too. I think this is a good time for me to reflect on things. To grow and not let what others think and say, really get to me. This is MY time, and no one elses. So, what I am going to do now is, go shower, then do my taxes, and then see if my good friend Ryan is avaible to go out. I feel like shopping for new pants being that I lost weight. If not, I'll just read, write or try to sleep. I should update again soon, if my mind keeps going at this pace. Later. --Ally |